that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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