That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
