I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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