How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
