I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
