I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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