She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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