I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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