You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
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