I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
