I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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