do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
