I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
50% drunk capacity currently
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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