i just wanna soil my oats bro
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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