im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
