why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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