I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
You're like the curious george of whores
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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