i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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