if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
