I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize