I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
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