my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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