Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
