I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
