I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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