I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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