Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
