return my video game
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
