AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
