How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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