Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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