well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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