K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize
