I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
