What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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