i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
