toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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