Don't you send me to vm
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
