he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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