Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
