We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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