help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
