love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
