i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
