Im at strip club and am horny
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
