Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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