In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
