Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
