how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
