guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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